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A husband’s social media submit has gone viral for summarizing — in 2024 — an age-old {couples}’ problem: Is the man pulling his weight around the home?
The submit on Reddit has grabbed over 2,300 reactions and 1,400 feedback in lower than 24 hours.
A husband, 36, mentioned he and his wife, 38, have been married for eight years. They have two youngsters, ages 7 and 5.
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“She is a stay-at-home mom,” he wrote, “accountable for all the house responsibilities and childrearing whereas I work and canopy us financially.”
He added a caveat immediately: “Before you start attacking me, hear me out.”
“She is a stay-at-home mom, in charge of all the housework and childrearing while I work and cover us financially,” wrote a person lately on social media about his wife (not pictured). He requested others for recommendation and help with a severe relationship difficulty. (iStock)
He mentioned the couple “ran into a bit of bad luck with debt a few years ago,” and because of this, he mentioned he works about 50-60 hours every week “to help us get out of it.”
The man, who did not share his location however known as himself “ThrowRA_boiyy,” mentioned he is a carpenter — “so the days are long, and sometimes I drive quite a bit to get to the work sites. By the time I get home, I am exhausted and pretty much eat, then collapse into bed.”
“I never thought I was one of those guys.”
He described the household’s weekend routines, noting he takes his son and daughter to soccer video games, then is “back home for lunch, while my wife goes to [her] book club [meetings, has] lunch with her friends, then usually [does] some sort of hike or yoga class. She is back by midafternoon, at which point she takes back over the kids.”
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The husband mentioned that on Saturday nights, he makes dinner, “maybe [does] a bit of laundry and cleans the floors.”
Then on Sunday, “it is reversed. I go out with my mates. By mid-afternoon, I return, we have our babysitter come around and we spend the night together.”
A person’s wife lately informed him he must “start doing more around the house. That I need to do more cleaning, organizing, looking after the kids, grocery shopping, cooking,” the husband informed others as he sought recommendation. (iStock)
He mentioned he is learn loads on social media “about men not doing enough at home — but I never thought I was one of those guys.”
Yet lately, he wrote, his wife got here to him “saying that I need to start doing more around the house. That I need to do more cleaning, organizing, looking after the kids, grocery shopping, cooking.”
“I don’t know physically how to find more time to contribute on weekdays.”
He added, “I know that she does a lot, and I am in no way saying she doesn’t deserve a break, but I am working really hard, too. Especially at the moment. I feel like I do the best I can with how much work I’m doing.”
He informed others, “I explained this to her and she said I was being ridiculous. That I spend all day having fun at work with my workmates, while she deals with the children and all of the house chores. Then I get home and just eat and go to bed. This isn’t the plan forever — but I thought it was going all right for now.”
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He invited others to weigh in on the scenario. Fox News Digital tried to succeed in the unique poster for additional feedback.
In an edit to his submit, the man added afterward, “I care for all the payments, automobile funds, insurance coverage dates.” He additionally added of his wife, “When she expressed her need for help, it was nothing specific and when we had this discussion she did not give me any specific examples. And even if she did, I leave at 5 a.m. and I’m not usually back ’til 7:30 p.m.”
He mentioned, “I get home and shower, eat and put laundry into the machine, unpack my work gear, I play/read/clean up our kids, and I’m in bed by 8:30 p.m. I don’t know physically how to find more time to contribute on weekdays.”
Saying he is in mattress throughout the week by 8:30 p.m., a person on Reddit (not pictured) described his packed workdays as a carpenter. (iStock)
Many commenters on the social media thread had questions for the husband — with one asking if he left objects around the home and anticipated his wife to wash up after him in addition to after the youngsters.
Another individual wrote that the wife “lost any support I would have given her as soon as she said he gets to go to work and ‘have fun all day’ with his mates.”
A unique commenter mentioned, “I am guessing she is maybe lonely during the week and in need of other grown-ups to talk to.”
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Overall, most commenters on the thread felt he was not in the improper for a way he is dealing with issues, given the demands of his line of labor. Wrote one one who was the major monetary supplier in the house, “This [debate over household chores] was actually a reason I ended up divorced.”
The Associated Press famous a couple of years in the past in relation to a brand new report, “Experts say one reason women report doing more house and child care work is not only because they actually do more — which is often true — but also because men are not always aware of all the work involved. That includes planning family activities and organizing appointments and even things like providing children with emotional support.”
“Women are much more likely than their husbands to care for children on a daily basis, shop for groceries and wash dishes.”
Gallup additionally reported in 2020 that “although women comprise nearly half of the U.S. workforce, they still fulfill a larger share of household responsibilities.”
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The group added, “Married or partnered heterosexual couples in the U.S. continue to divide household chores along largely traditional lines, with the woman in the relationship shouldering primary responsibility for doing the laundry (58%), cleaning the house (51%) and preparing meals (51%). At the same time, men continue to take the lead in keeping the car in good condition (69%) and doing yardwork (59%).”
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Gallup additionally mentioned, “In addition to laundry, cleaning and cooking, women are the primary decision-makers when it comes to home decor in 62% of households. Although there is more equity in some of the other tasks, women are also much more likely than their husbands to care for children on a daily basis, shop for groceries and wash dishes.”
However, as Rebecca Brown Wright, a blogger and mom of three primarily based in Utah, wrote lately, “Housekeeping is an adult responsibility. It is NOT synonymous with motherhood.”
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